Me, Too.

       What it is.

       A number of people are posting "Me, too" as their status to bring awareness of sexual assault/harassment. These people are victims of one form or another of these crimes, ranging from girls getting fondled by peers in middle school, to date rape, etc. There's a variety of experiences out there, and I (as you should be, too) am simply heart broken, yet not surprised at the high volume of victims that I have in my social circle. It seems nearly everyone has experienced it. 

       What it isn't. 

       This movement of awareness is not an invitation for you to ask for details on what happened for them. This is not them inviting you into their trauma, it is to make you aware that it exists. This is not a cry for attention for themselves, but rather a way of calling attention to the issue. This has nothing to do with them as individuals, and everything to do with the trouble in our society.

       So many have opened up and identified themselves, yet still there are those who have experienced it and can't find the strength to say anything. To those who can not acknowledge the pain they've faced, I believe I speak for us all when I say we see you, we are here for you, we are pulling for you, we support you, and we love you. No one owes anyone their story, no one is entitled to your personal life. 

       What we hope to see.

       Again, I believe I speak for us all when I say we want to see improvement. We want to see progress. We want to see boys being able to speak up about their trauma without their "manhood" coming into question, we want to see young children going about their days worrying less about their bodies and more about the worlds they are currently building. I want to see my sisters on this planet walking down the street or from their car to their destination without having to turn their keys into makeshift weapons. I want to see my brothers on this planet treating themselves and others with respect. I want to see all of us being able to experience life without being told that where we are a victim we are at fault, or being pressured into becoming monsters. I want open minds and active hearts, and most of all, safe bodies. 

       What you can do.

       Question the way you were raised, both by society and in your family. Admit when something was toxic or divisive, and then don't perpetuate it. Listen when others open up to you. Acknowledge the role you've played, either as victim or assailant, and get the help you need to correct it. Apologize where necessary, heal what needs healed. Learn and expand your mind, see that there are multiple forms of abuse. Above all else, love those who surround you, and engage in the learn-teach dynamic we have in our society today. 

      Remember...

      You are not the dictator of what qualifies as traumatic, hurtful, or abusive towards another person. Some people lose all sense of safety from being groped repeatedly in the hallways. Others will have their worlds shaken in different ways. You don't get to decide whether that person has a right to be hurt or not. You can not know in the way that they do what they've experienced. Your job is to listen and show compassion when someone loves and trusts you enough to open up. 

       You should never feel ashamed or afraid to talk about your experiences. These sorts of things thrive in the shadows of secrecy. Name it, call it what it is, own your story, and heal it. You have within you what it takes to overcome any obstacle that comes your way, and you can become strong. 

       My heart goes out to everyone who is participating in the "me, too" event, both vocally and silently. We are all brothers and sisters in this, and I am so, so grateful for those who go out of their ways to heal and nurture. I offer my time to listen to those who need to speak. May healing and loving vibrations find you all, wherever you may be. It is my earnest desire that you will all make the most of your situations and experiences.